The last five days have been a cascade of financial headaches:
- The used car I bought for $10,000 just 18 months ago requires another $4,000 repair – its fourth major breakdown. It seems to throw a tantrum every few months, demanding expensive attention before it’ll drive another mile.
- Turning 65 opened the door to various senior support programs, including a debt relief offer that promised to shave $10,000 off my $27,000 Citibank balance. What they didn’t tell me: Citibank would retaliate by freezing my account. Now I’m paying $500 monthly directly to Citibank, plus $450 to the debt relief plan. So much for “relief.”
- And of course, there’s the daily drip of inflation and tariffs, draining a little more life out of every dollar. If only my business was making more money.
But here’s the thing: none of these problems, as annoying as they are, compared to real hardship – serious illness, shuttered businesses, losing people you love.
The real pain this week came from how viciously I turned on myself. I’ve worked hard not to go there, but last night I did. I let those old, cruel voices take over: “You’re an idiot.” “You cut corners.” “You screwed up – again.”
Yes, I made some decisions that weren’t great. I could have asked more questions, done more research, reached out for advice.
But I live in New York City – one of the most expensive places on earth – and I love it. After living in Boston, DC, London, Germany, and Tokyo, this is home. And living here means occasionally getting knocked around.
This morning, after a rough night of self-blame, I chose a different path. I picked myself up, took a breath, and started making the calls, facing the issues head-on. No drama, just action.
That’s what I do. That’s who I am. I stumble, sometimes hard – but I always get up.
My mother says I’m survivor. I prefer to think that I’m an optimist. Even when life throws a wrench (or a $4,000 car repair), I keep going. Because resilience isn’t about never falling – it’s about how fast you stand back up.
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